THE REVIEWS ARE IN

In this day and age, if you want to know about something before you buy it, whether it be some product or restaurant, or auto mechanic, etc, you go online and read reviews of what others who have already bought or used it have to say about it. Especially when you are buying something online, as customer reviews are readily available for the product you are looking at. The bad news is, even with people commenting on these products and/or services, you have to understand the world out there. People are.....people. Some reviews just might be from employees giving it a glowing review to help push the product, some might be from the competition dissing the product and some might be from actual customers who have legitimately and honestly given their take on it. You still have to use a little common sense in the matter.

Then there are products available out there that make you wonder what kind of person is looking that up in the first place. And you can only imagine the reviews these things get. Here's a few products on Amazon.com, the world's largest online retailer and some very interesting reviews to go with them.



Product: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme

Review: Being a loose cannon who does not play by the rules the first thing I did was ignore the warning and smear this all over my knob and bollocks. The bollocks I knew and loved are gone now. In their place is a maroon coloured bag of agony which sends stabs of pain up my body every time it grazes against my thigh or an article of clothing. I am suffering so that you don't have to. Heed my lesson. DO NOT PUT ON KNOB AND BOLLOCKS!!

(I am giving this product a 5 because despite the fact that I think my bollocks might fall off, they are now completely hairless.)

 

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Product: Fresh Whole Rabbit

Review: I ordered one of these Fresh “Whole” Rabbits, but when it arrived its head, fur and insides were missing. Not exactly whole, I’d say! Maybe it was just damaged during shipping, but I won’t be buying another one. I mean – without the long ears, how do I know it even WAS a rabbit? It was the same size and shape as a cat…not that I’ve seen a cat with its head, fur and insides missing. I mean, not like really close or anything.

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Product: Canned Unicorn Meat

Review: Delicious!! Of course this isn't as good as fresh, but who has time to hunt unicorns these days?

I'm a busy professional so I don't have the luxury of just grabbing my bow and quiver and spending days in the high glens hunting fresh 'corn. This product allows me to come home from a hectic day and enjoy a meal packed with that special nutrition only unicorn can provide. I even keep a few cans at the office for those late nights.

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Product: UFO Detector

Review: I, as a resonable and trUstworthy hUman, do not gleep nerp this ungood prodUct. Bad it is for Us hUmans to purchase and opperate this online pUrchasable prodUct.

As the person from Earth that I am, I think that all of my other fellow hUmans on Earth should immediately disUse and florgnify this Utterly Zorglefran, I mean bad item for bUying. Ha Ha. I am laughing with hUmor with the funny word I made up with my typing that I am not doing by direct thought extraction, and instant data transmission to Amazon.com website. Ha Ha. That was highly hUmoroUs and glerp.

UFO detectors are so dUmb because all humans from Earth like the one I am, know that we I mean they do not even exist! Ha Ha

Besides even if the alien friends did exist, who minds occassional anal probe for benefit of aliens that don't exist glerp science! I, as a resonable and trustworthy human person from Earth sure wouldn't mind helping our fUtUre overlords!

Do not bUy this prodUct.