What better way to get my little blog started than to talk about a little device that seems to have taken over the world - THE CELLPHONE, or as I like to call it, a wireless pocket phone. Remember in Star Trek when Captain Kirk would flip open a communicator and tell Scotty to "beam me up"? Star Trek, originally made in the 1960's, was a somewhat realistic look into our far, far future. In fact, it wasn't long after that that we already had a similar communication device...the cellphone. Now we don't have the technology where we dematerialize and then reappear somewhere else, but I'm not so sure the beaming technology doesn't exist, specifically when it comes to cellphones seeming to beam people's minds to another galaxy.
Pick a freeway, any freeway. If you happened to pick one that isn't a bumper to bumper parking lot and it's moving along at posted speeds, well, consider yourself lucky. Living in a major city, it isn't easy to find one of those. If you do find yourself moving along at 65 mph or better, it's almost a guarantee that you're going to come up on someone that is driving much slower than the flow of traffic. And it doesn't matter what lane you're in. You're now tailgating this car trying to wait for an opening to switch lanes with everyone on either side now flying by both of you. When you're finally able to get over and pass the car, you look in as you're passing and you notice something that a scientific study confirms now happens with a 114% certainty (you'll just have to trust me on this one), and it's that this slow moving douche is yapping away on a cellphone. Really?
Yes, it is an all too common occurrence what I just described above. We've all heard about people driving with their knees because their hands are occupied either eating with one hand with a hot cup of coffee in the other, reading a book or newspaper, digging around on the floor for the CD case, and of course the crazy rumor that some women put their makeup on, all while driving! Actually, those are all things that you can understand why one might drive a little slower than those around them. All are still insane things to do behind the wheel of a moving vehicle, but at least you can see why the person doing these things might be driving a little erratically at best. Enter the cellphone. Not only one more thing to take your mind of the road but it seems that holding a cellphone to one's ear has a direct affect on the muscles in the leg making them unable to push the foot forward, like one would do when stepping on the gas pedal. There are those that thought it might be because of how the arm is bent when holding the phone to one's ear, but the same leg muscle malfunction happens with earpieces such as Bluetooth, as well.
Remember when cellphones were used for talking? Not any more. Now the "wireless pocket phone" is a wireless pocket computer. First came texting, where instead of speaking words, you know, talking to someone, you instead type them a short little message. As for myself, I am not much of a texter. Of course I just have a simple phone where you still have to push 7 four times to get an S. I mean, I'm not going to sit there and peck at the number pad 35 times to ask someone "R U going 2 the game". I'll just call and ask. But no matter how I feel about it, texting is big. Texting is done with a cellphone, cellphones go with you anywhere, including your car, so you guessed it, now people are texting while they drive!!!
And that's not the end of it. With these little devices having the ability to go on the internet, it really is like a mini computer. You can even watch TV and movies on these things, take pictures and videos, you might even be able to shave with them for all I know. All from the comfort of your driver's seat in the middle lane of I-10 west at 65 mph....scratch that, make it 45 mph when you should be going 65. Moron!! Behind the wheel of your moving car has literally become a desk or office on wheels. Too bad the damn cellphone can't drive for some of these idiots.
Literally every morning you can listen to traffic reports and there are always 5, 6 or more accidents reported. And the same thing in the afternoon rush hour. I do a lot of driving here in the 4th largest city in America, Houston, Texas, and I am baffled that the accident numbers are that low. I've seen the driving with the knee while both hands are on the phone texting. Many times. I've seen a car zip across 3 lanes so they can exit, without even looking. You catch up to that dufus at the stop light and sure enough, cellphone to face. People have lost their freaking minds with the cellphones. They literally can't even walk and work these things at the same time. I honestly saw someone walk into a store window she thought was a door because she had her head down into that phone texting away. You can't even walk with the damn thing and now you're going to get behind the wheel of a car? Oh and let's not forgot those that as soon as they pull up to a stop light, can't wait to get on the phone and text or surf the net or what have you. Which I guess is better than driving on a highway doing it, but now you're sitting through green lights because you can't get your freaking head out of the phone. And you wonder why there's road rage.
I get the advancing technology and the things the cellphone can do are amazing, but behind the wheel of a car is not the place to do it. PEOPLE DIE BECAUSE OF THIS!!! There's already laws being made to ban cellphone use in a vehicle. You can't use them in school zones here in the Houston area. There's places banning or wanting to ban them completely. And though I'm one who is always for less of government telling me what I can or can't do, I can see why. A whole lot of laws that just shouldn't be on the books have to be made because of idiots like these car driving cellphone users. I like to think not so much to protect them, but to protect us working grey matter between the ears people, from them. Unfortunate but stupid people will screw up a good thing every. single. time.
So if you're reading this blog while you're driving a vehicle, GET OFF THE DAMN ROAD YOU MORON!!!! Pull over somewhere out of harm's way and wait for a phone call. I believe it will be your proctologist with the results of where your head is.
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